SHRIMPMEAT.NET REVIEWS

DMV---ZERO!!! Today I went to the DMV, I would have to give it the lowest rating of all. Very poor air quality, what with the dumb lady in front of me coughing all over the place. San Francisco has the quaint system of making you stand in line for a couple of hours rather than having the decency to take a number and wait in a seat. Yeah, I know you're supposed to call for an appointment, but I tried a few times and the goddamned computer "system" was always "busy." Hard to believe the wonderful technology available!! DMV, you get a big ZERO in the reviews section of Shrimpmeat.net.
Office Depot---THREE! Office Depot, well, what do I expect. I mean, there are plenty of other options, so really I have no right to review them when I knew what I was walking into. I thought it would be a dash-in-dash-out kind of printer ink run, but nooooo, as usual, there were about four registers open and a few people waiting at each one. For some reason, transactions take a really really long time there. I can't quite figure out why.
Farley's---NINE!!! Tonight I went to Farley's with Mikey. I would have to give them a nine because I ordered tea and it was nice and hot and Mikey ordered chocolate cake and it ruled, we got wired and played Backgammon, one of the many games available for customers. I have also played some good Yahtzee at Farley's.
Park Bench Cafe---EIGHT!!! Park Bench Cafe is a cafe on Precita Park, if you're ever in the Bernal area of San Francisco. Now, if I had reviewed this cafe a month ago, they would have gotten a BIG FAT ZERO because they used to have the absolute worst coffee in San Francisco. No kidding, it was worse than coffee you get a truck stop in Rifle, Colorado. It was not only burnt bad but bad beans that were brewed really strong in hopes to cover up how nasty they were; they tasted like ground up cockroaches. Anyway, the cafe just changed hands, and Halleluia! they make a good cup and they've really cleaned it up in there.
Noah's Bagels---TWO. The reason Noah's gets a two and not a ten is simple: SIX dollar bagel with lox, FAKE bagels, way too much cream cheese and way too little lox, and that stupid Yiddish ad campaign that only features blond super models (yes I KNOW Jews can be blond but COME ON that ad campaign is so lame). And besides "Noah's New York Bagels," is from FUCKING LOS ANGELES, NOT NEW YORK. So stop going there. (I only went there out of sheer desperation because I was so hungry I wanted to kill somebody but afterwards I wanted to kill everybody and almost ripped a cell phone out of a girl's hand and stomped on it and kicked her in the shin upon which her ultra blue jeans were rolled.)
Just For You----TWO. Just For You is a breakfast and lunch joint up on Potrero Hill. There is always a line to get in and for what? The food is overpriced, I end up spending ten dollars on eggs and coffee, and the owner is a complete bitch. Now if she was serving cheap grub in an empty restaurant then it would be ok to be such a bitch. Just For You is totally over rated and full of cheesy people. Nothing to be so snobby about here.
SOMA Cafe---NINE. SOMA Cafe is an unassuming place next door to the Youth Hostel on Folsom Street. I walked in there one day for lunch because I noticed it. They serve great food. For FIVE dollars you can get the best breakfast in town. Whatever you order comes with the option of homefries or hash browns AND toast or two pancakes! You can feast for cheap. I went there for lunch and got a good pepper steak sandwich. YUM. The whole restaurant is very clean. I like to sit at the counter. There are a couple of bad paintings up so they don't get a perfect ten. Oh, and there is NEVER a line there. This place is unknown!
Al's Cafe----ONE. The only reason Al's Cafe gets a one is because the decor is so overdone that I like it, and the waitresses are nice. But, the food sucks. I ordered waffle and eggs and the waffle dough was nasty and the eggs were boring. The juice is poured out of those little cans into a mini glass and that's the large. I've been there three times and each time the food was awful, well at least for my taste because the place is crowded.
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